On a beautiful warm evening several weeks ago a couple of my friends caught up and hung out for dinner. It was an excellent balmy night and we soon discovered during our catch-up session that during the Christmas-New Years break Aaron had popped the question to Emma... and she had delightfully agreed!
The engagement ring was impressive - a nice diamond, set on a nice think band... I couldn't help but jokingly remark, "Wow, that's beautiful. The exquisite diamond reminds us of Emma, and the thickness of the wedding ring reminds us of Aaron!"
It was then that the topic of singledom reared its ugly little head, but thankfully I wasn't the target... Willo was.
"So Willo why aren't you with someone yet?" asked Aaron.
Willo, who'd be turning 32 this year, smiled and said that he was working on it. I decided to turn it up a notch and told Aaron that he had told me there were "many chics" he was "working on".
And that was all the bull needed.
"So why don't you invite one of your girlfriends along and we can all hang out as a group?" continued Aaron.
It was a great idea, I mean, if Willo was serious with all these supposed women he was "working on" surely there'd be one or two who wouldn't mind his company and come along on an outing with a group?
Willo didn't volley back, so Aaron kept going...
"Why not man, just ask one to come along."
I knew a couple of names of chics that he'd mentioned and there was one in particular that kept coming up, so I added more fuel to the fire...
"What about Meagan?" I asked.
Aaron's eyes bulged... "Yes, ask Meagan to come along."
Willo knew that Aaron wasn't giving up. He'd either have to think of another topic real soon, or just give in to his demands.
"Come on man, our wedding will be coming up soon, you should see if you can invite Meagan over so that she'd feel comfortable coming to our wedding with you."
Aaron definitely was coming out with some good ideas. If Willo really did have all these women lined up, why not just ask them out?
By now Willo was beginning to get a little irritated, but Aaron seemed to have all the right answers...
"Come on dude, I remember when I was staying at your place and when I was contemplating going out with Emma you told me to 'Go for it'. Now it seems it's my turn to return the favour!"
After more banter between the two Willo knew Aaron wasn't giving up. He'd either have to arrange with Meagan to go on an outing, or... admit that he really didn't have all these women lined up.
The latter wasn't an option.
"Fine," Willo said, "I'll get in contact with her and find out if she'd be interested in going out."
Aaron took a sigh of relief. His work was done.
And with that Willo left the room.
Initially we all thought that maybe he had gone to use the toilet, but upon his return he brazenly told us that he tried calling Meagan.
Wow, I thought, he had her number! Maybe I was wrong about what he said about all the chics he had lined up!
"And?" prodded Aaron.
"She didn't answer her phone, so I just sent her a message to give us a call when she gets this message," he replied.
"Well done," congratulated Emma.
It was as the night progressed that Willo's mobile beeped... he had just received a message.
Aaron knew who that was from, and let out a deep "WoooOoOoooOoooo".
Willo read out what she had sent,
"Hi Chris, sorry I missed your call, I'm unfortunately in a loud area but will call later."
I was impressed.
"Nice," Aaron remarked.
Moments passed and Willo added, well I've replied to her with this message...
"Hi Meagan. No worries. Was just wanting to know if you'd like to catch up for a coffee one-on-one. I understand you're busy, but let us know when you're available and we'll arrange a time and place together."
I don't know why he felt compelled to reply back, Meagan was already going to call later that night, and I don't know why he added catching up on a "one-on-one" basis... it was beginning to move from an outing to now a date.
I guess Willo felt he could take it to that level.
About an hour later Willo's mobile beeped again - he had another message from Meagan we all guessed. Aaron let out another wailing woo.
But before Willo read the message he decided to go around the table asking each of us whether Meagan had accepted his invitation to go for a coffee or not.
He pointed to Aaron...
"Yep, she wants you dude," said Aaron eyes bulging.
He pointed to Emma...
"Oh yes, definitely," said Emma with a smile.
He pointed to me... I paused...
"No. She'll turn you down," I said, rather flatly.
Willo immediately flipped open his phone and began reading the message quietly to himself. Upon reading the message he threw the phone onto the middle of the table to allow everyone to see her reply.
Emma read it out loud for Aaron and I...
"Hi Chris. Thanks for the invite, but I just want to remain friends at this stage. Will see you at church on Sunday."
That killed the night.
On the ride back home I dropped Willo off, and although we didn't talk much, he did try to blame Aaron for forcing the issue.
"Don't blame anybody but yourself dude," I said, "Aaron didn't twist your arm, neither did he tell you to call her that very night, neither did he tell you to text her the very words YOU used. And what's the problem anyway? At least you know where you stand with her."
I was talking to a brick wall though.
His ego had been dented.
A week passed and I caught up with Willo again.
Interestingly he talked about Meagan.
"I saw her at church on Sunday," he said.
"Oh cool. Did you talk to her?"
"Well... I was talking to Michelle in the cafe section after church and she came and sat across the table from me."
"Awesome. Did you say hi?"
"NO WAY! I gave her the cold shoulder and kept my focus on Michelle while she sat there."
He beamed a victory like smile, glad that he was able to give someone such cold treatment.
"WHAT????????? Dude, you are the biggest tool," I said along with other more colourful words, cross at his attitude about the whole ordeal.
"What if she wanted to apologise?" I asked, "What if she wanted to get to know you a little better? What if you made a joke about it and asked her after when she had sat down, 'Where's *my* coffee?' and if she replied with something like 'I didn't get you one' you could've laughingly responded with a smile and something like, 'Well some friend *you* are!'" (lol)
This woman had deflated his ego. And he wasn't having a bar of her anymore.
What an idiot.
No wonder he's single.
The Internet Age
1 week ago