Thursday, February 14, 2008

The Dating Project

What do you think the results would be if the following test was conducted.

You get 100 single men and 100 single women.

None of them should know anyone from the opposite sex.

Take facial photos of each person and distribute these to the opposite sex where they would choose the 10 people they'd likely date based solely on the portrait photo and 10 people they definitely wouldn't date.

Take a voice recording of each person where they have to give a 1 minute speech selling themselves (physical qualities shouldn't be mentioned on the audio).

Then have the opposite sex listen to the recordings and again have each person choose 10 people they'd likely date based solely on the sound recordings and again choose 10 people they didn't like based on their sound recordings.

Lastly you'd get 100 different fragrances, maybe 50 perfumes, 50 colognes, and have each gender pick 5 from each group.

What do you think the test results would show??

Would there be a any correlation between someone's physical attractiveness and their 1 minute personality?? Would there even be any correlation at all with smell and physical attraction/personality??

I dunno.

Personally I think you'd be surprised by the portrait photos and the sound recordings, there'd probably be a strong negative correlation, or no correlation, and I wouldn't have a clue on smell because I don't think anyone dates solely on how the other person smells... although I don't think a relationship lasts long if one partner pongs!

And what about touch??


Jen said...

I think that your right. I think that seeing a photo all you have is your imagination as to who and what that person is. Its sort of like reading a really good book and then you go and see the movie but the characters arent like you invisioned them to be when reading the book.

I think one of the hardest and yet coolest things about the internet is that you sort of get the chance to meet someone backwards.

I blogged about the idea of meeting someone that way "On the inside out" November 2005.

I just think the idea you could find out who someone is first before you let all the visual attraction or physical chemestry come into play would you do things differently?

Ryan said...

Yeah I think I wrote something about this ages ago too, but I'll be sure to read your entry.

But you're spot on. And having been someone who at the age of about 19 dated someone after meeting them on a chat channel can definitely vouch at how weird it is when you talk to someone over the internet, then over the phone, before then finally meeting them in person... it definitely wasn't what I expected!!

I guess this is why when I do meet people over the internet I always think of the worst of what they'd look like physically. And I do this not purely because I think everybody's ugly, but it prevents ME getting too emotionally attached to my imaginations... and I know I've got one crazy imagination!

And wasn't there a match-making show on TV, arrrgh... what was it called... Perfect Match, I think (Fiona might be able to help here), where they would line up three people from the opposite sex behind a wall and then have the selecting person ask each contestant a few questions. At the end of the show the person would choose one and they'd go off on some exotic location.

As the show no longer exists they did a segment where they interviewed those couples who met on the show to see if any had married/were still together etc... and surprisingly a handful still were.

So maybe there is something to meeting backwards??

Jen said...

I sometimes think seeing the person spoils it a bit. Because its hard not to let your visual feelings about a person come into play when you look at them.

I mean hey might not even talk to me if you could see my that hairy mole on my chin. LOL

Not because I think your that shallow...but lets face it a hairy mole is a bit of a distraction to normal conversation. : )

Ryan said...

Yeah this is why I think the internet can be detrimental to women as men can hide behind it.

I think God has given women that sixth innate sense that allows them to discern the intents of man by reading his body language... and with the medium of the internet these days women haven't got that luxury.

I was talking to a couple of people last week about internet dating, and while I have nothing against it I made sure the women understood not to get too involved with someone until you had met them first and had some friendly conversations with them.

The internet's a great place to meet people, but I think can be a little dangerous if you're looking for love.

Jen said...

I think thats why you take your time. It doesnt matter if you are face to face or a million miles away in cyber space.

You get to know that person inside and out...We all put on a good face when meeting someone. We are on our best behavior..good manners...nice clothing. Because we are conscious of that first impression. Its no differnet online. But over time..those first layers will start to peel away. The real person start to emerge. Its not that the first person you met wasnt real...But its more they werent realistic...because we are all a combination of things...good and bad.

Its when you can see the other persons good things and their flaws that you really know who they are.

Ryan said...

That's right.

We all like to play nice initially, and we all tend to do it because I don't think you could get anywhere with anyone if you were mean and horrible all the time!

I guess that's the dilemma for those, especially women who may want to have kids but their body clock's ticking away, have.

Which is why I enjoy the Amazing Race. I think every couple looking to marry should do it. It's such intense high stress situations, but it cuts straight to the metal and fibre of each person.

If only we all could be on the Amazing Race (I know I'd love to do it)! ;o)

Jen said...

The true test if a woman is being herself is what she eats when shes around you. If shes just eating a salad...or the customary chicken fingers on a date shes still trying to be on her best behavior.

When shes comfortable enough to eat BBQ around you..that is a secure woman. lol

Ryan said...

How about if she burps the alphabet??


I have to admit it scares me a little when a woman doesn't eat. There's nothing more uncomfortable than having someone sitting opposite the table watching you eat!

Jen said...

If shes burping the alphabet..shes too much woman for you and you need to excuse yourself and exit the building! IMPORTANT...DO NOT MAKE EYE CONTACT.

Ill tell you why that happens...first girls dont want to look stupid chewing in front of a guy. They are nervous. They also order a guy thinks they are low matainance. Plus..chichen fingers are a relatively neat food to consume..You dont have to worry about spilling on yourself or stuff being stuck in your teeth or on your face.

Guys...well they dont care about any of that so much...they just want food.

Ryan said...


And if she asks before I've started on my meal, "Are you going to eat that?" what do I do, let her have it and run??

And thanks for the insight, I never really completely understood why women were so defensive when they ate. Now I do - they don't want to look stupid! Would making them feel comfortable ease the tension and help them relax a little? Should I offer to feed her?

"Okay, here comes the aeroplane... open wide..."

HAHA... (that would be soooo funny on a first date)... hehehe...

Jen said...

Well I suppose thats a judgement call. If you really want to take a chance that you can part platonically after shes taken the time to seranade you with her version of the alphabet song..... then I say sure go a head eat your food.

But if you think theres a good chance that she might be offended when you tell her shes not the right one with the whole its not you its me speech...I say why take the chance she will put in in a headlock and make you cry?

You can get a cheeseburger any where right?

Fiona said...

OK, you two are starting to scare me. LOL. All this in-depth stuff... too much for my poor feeble little brain to handle. (Sorry guys!)

Anyway, yes, Ryan, it was Perfect Match. We used to watch that as kids and it was great to catch up with them again when they do the reunion shows etc.

I like the idea of getting to know someone "backwards" but I don't believe it's right for me. No real reason why, it's just me.

Fiona said...

Oh, and further to the not eating thing. I think it's because women like to give the impression that they're not pigs with food. LOL

Sorta more lady-like than hoeing into a steak or something "manly" like that.

Beats me, I order what I like and if other people can't deal with that, it's no skin off my nose. LOL

Ryan said...

Hi Fiona!

Thanks for commenting!!

Yeah I agree. I like the concept of "backwards", but there needs to be that physical element - for a woman I think it's imperative, they need to use that innate sixth sense of discernment.

PS - and I'm glad you eat too. ;o)