Friday, October 27, 2006

Profiting From Pizza

$50 - $34 = $466.60

Yeah I didn't quite understand it either.

After waiting patiently in line for several minutes while an old bloke tried to bust some moves on the European chic behind the counter he came to his senses and noticed he was holding up a queue... me!

"Oh sorry there mate," he said excusing himself away from the counter where I could pay for my order.

"That's okay," I said, "I thought you were just talking to your granddaughter."

I don't think he heard my last bit - it may have had something to do with the earpiece in his ear, but as he wobbled his way back to the table I saw one of his old mate's wink at him and smile.

Oh boy, I felt sorry for what this European chic was going to be in for tonight.

"Yies, kan I hilp yew ser?" she asked.

I was trying to make out what accent she had, it definitely sounded German, but could also have been Czech, maybe Bulgarian (although I had no idea what a Bulgarian sounded like), or Romanian (ditto), or perhaps even Latvian! Heck, it could very well have been Italian considering it was an Italian restaurant!! I just didn't know, but I think the old man before me was hoping to find out... ew, gross, does that mean I think like an old man!

I bumbled a bit trying to find my own native tongue (yes she was hot) and spat out something that didn't sound English, nor Eastern European (or German, or Italian).

"I'm sorry," I paused and after grabbing hold of my tongue told her why I was here, "I've come to pick up two pizzas."

"Ah yies," she said flicking through a short stack of receipts, "tew vegeterien."

"Yep, that's sounds right."

She told me the total price, being $34, and I gave her a $50 note.

After plugging the data into the cash register $466.60 came up.


She stared at the numbers.

How cool's this! I thought, they give ME money to take their pizza! I think I might order as much as I can, I'll even go and back up my car right now!!

The chic was a little befuzzled by the ordeal.

She checked my receipt again, looked at what I had given her, and tried to calculate how much change she had to give me because OBVIOUSLY the cash machine wasn't working.

"Ei giv yew $16 yies?" she asked.

"Yep, that's right," I answered, "but I don't mind if you give me $466 dollars."

She gave me the $16 in change, handed me the pizzas, and thanked me.

Yep, I think it was going to be a loooong night for that chic... good luck!

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