Saturday, September 30, 2006

Another Weekend Away

It's a long weekend this weekend... Australia wide too, although I think us Westerners are celebrating the Queen's birthday whereas the Easterners are celebrating Labour Day!?

But anyway, we're off to Busselton again this weekend predominantly because my mate Jon-Jon's wife is playing at SportsFest.

SportsFest is a compilation of sporting games held amongst Baptist churches for people between the ages of 13 and 27.

It's a great time of playing sports and meeting people - I used to love it when I was once in that age group (I'm sounding like it was years ago, and in fact it was because I haven't been to SportsFest for years).

Anyway, Jon-Jon are taking down our golf clubs and will be hacking away at several golf courses during the games, but I hope we do get the opportunity to have a wander round... I might be able to catch up with some old friends.

And the place where we're staying?

The lil cabin of horrors again... *scream*

Gotta scoot!

PS - Go the West Coast Eagles!!!

Wednesday, September 27, 2006

Yay! My First YouTube Video!

I created and have now posted my first YouTube video... yay!!

Here it is... :o)

P.S. - for those that frequent YouTube does anyone have any ideas about lonelygirl15's religion? It sure ain't Christianity, Catholicism, Buddihism, Islam, or Mormonism... although I did that someone identified a picture of Alister Crowley hanging up in her room somewhere - could it be Satanism/witchcraft?? Either way it sure is weird!?

Thursday, September 21, 2006

All About Albany

Albany was awesome.

There's so much to talk about that I really don't want know where to start!?

I suppose I could talk about the women in town... not... that... I... was... looking... MUCH!

Yes, I will confirm my parent's opinion that there does seem to be a larger quantity of chics in Albany than blokes. And yes, many of them are quite attractive. In fact as we were driving down Albany's main street I almost gave myself whiplash keeping up with all the different women walking up and down the street!

And what I found even more interesting is that they'd almost stare me down!


I'll definitely need to do some more exploring in this area in December!

Another topic that reared its head during the weekend was the prospect of moving down to Albany to live. I certainly don't have lack of a place to stay with an uncle, an aunty and a cousin all living down there in their separate abodes.

But if I did move down there'd be so much to do that I'd probably never be at home anyway!

I mean you've got things like: kayaking, rock climbing, hiking, swimming, surfing, cycling... there's just much more you can do down there because of all the sights, beaches and natural parks that you just can't do here in the city.

And I think that's why athletic/active type women attract me more than non-athletic/non-active types. I love being active, I love doing stuff, and I'd love doing stuff like that with someone who similarly enjoys it.

Unfortunately the problem with the city is that we don't have to do too much to have ourselves entertained. Out in the country you've got to create your own entertainment... and my brain is full of creativity and imagination (maybe that's a sign I'm really just a 9-year old boy trapped inside a man's body!).

Anyway, there's no shortage of things to do in Albany believe me.

I had an interesting talk to my cousin who is a single mother about women. She asked whether I was seeing anyone, or had anyone on my radar, and I told her no. Puzzled by this I explained that there were several women at church but they were too young (20-21 year olds).

And she agreed.

She even reiterated what I already thought by saying that women at that age don't know what they want. And that's why I believe it's not until a woman reaches the age of around 25 that she begins to at least settle down.

The only problem, my cousin added, is that when you begin looking around for women who are single around that age bracket you may find that they've got a kid.

Hmm... good point. I think it would be difficult being with someone who already had a child. I mean, you'd have to provide for and love that child, which wouldn't be that difficult, but then disciplining them would be the hardest thing. Yep, she'd have to be pretty special, I must admit.

So while Albany was indeed fun it made me think a lot about where I'd like to spend my life and who I'd like to spend it with.

Can't wait until December.

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

Another Million Dollar Idea

Today I went to the Whitford's City shopping center to get my haircut.

Quite a simple task really especially considering I already knew where I wanted to go.

Getting there was the hardest thing.


It seems Whitford's has this uncanny knack of annoying their shoppers by placing every conceivable salesperson in the middle of the mall.

No sooner have you entered the building have you been asked which telephone carrier you're with, what broadband company you use, whether you like the taste of this new disgustingly gross wheatgrass shot, how big the size of your mortgage is, whether you'd like to buy a ticket to a raffle that's rigged, and/or whether or not you think sleeping with this chic on a new bed is comfortable or not?

Okay, maybe with that last one had me daydreaming a little while a sales chic tried to impress me with some new fangle dangle matress, but in any case it was quite annoying and when I arrived at my destination I almost forgot what I was there for!

So what is my million dollar idea?

If I were an owner of a shopping mall I'd not advertise on TV the quantity of "specialty" shops or that the Wiggles are performing live... I'd just advertise "hassle free shopping", or maybe something cute like: "We don't spam our shoppers" and then we'd detail what we meant by not spamming our customers by comparing it to those pesky shopping centers with all those salespeople.

Brilliant huh?

You can come in do what you need to do and shop without having to avoid all those pesky little salespeople with their stands and products that you'll never be caught alive with.

I reckon you'd be swamped with customers.

Hmm... maybe I should patent that idea.

Regardless of what happened today all those annoying things dissipated when I had my hair cut by a hot chic who actually had some personality! Yeah, fancy that? A hairdresser that wasn't burnt out from the other dozen or so customers they've already counselled and cut today (I really feel sorry for all those hairdressers out there - it would be such a pain putting up with everyone talking about their problems as you cut their hair... I don't envy their job at all).

And on the way back home the following bumper sticker made me laugh...

Think this car is dirty?
Try the driver at night.
-Anonymous chic's bumper sticker

Monday, September 18, 2006

Aaaah... Albany

It was very difficult leaving paradise yesterday.

I haven't been to Albany for some 10-odd years and although the town has changed the coastline is evermore so beautiful - I've never seen water so crystal clear, nor beaches so squeaky white.

I can't wait for December... the only problem is that it's sooooo far away!!!

Oh well, at least I took some photos with my mobile that will help satiate any cravings I have between now and then.

So, without further ado, here are some of the photos I took of the weekend away.

The flight down to Albany was unbelievably quick. What would have taken 4-5 hours to drive from Perth to Albany took just over an hour by plane! One minute I'm enjoying a complementary choc-chip cookie and drinking some soft drink, next minute I'm forced to spit out the remainder of my cookie into the rubbish bin as we get ready to land!

The rest of Friday was spent at my uncle's place watching the mighty Freo Dockers whoop the Demons in the AFL prelim finals.

On the Saturday it was my mother's 50th (the reason for our trip down to Albany), here we were celebrating her 50th with breakfast at Monet's - my breakfast wasn't bad, however, when I pulled out a long black hair I began wondering whether I'd find a head in the remainder of my bircher muesli!

Thankfully I didn't.

While my sister and mother then went and celebrated the remainder of the morning doing something completely foreign to most women (they went shopping) my father and I went exploring the coast.

Our first stop was the wind farm which was the most colourful part of the weekend due to the huge array of flowers...

(See if you can spot a bee in that photo above)

We even had a legless lizard join in the festivities (I tried to take a photo with its tongue sticking out as the biggest difference you can tell between a legless lizard and a snake is the shape of the tongue - unfortunately the shutter speed on the mobile camera was always half a second too slow).

And words fail me to describe how beautiful the scenery was from here...

The only problem though was getting down to the beaches! Something which both my father and I would leave for another day.

However, we did go down a different, "smaller" flight of steps...

Giving us a closer shot of the beach... (you'll notice with this photo the different colourations of the water showing depth. Most beach fisherman fish into the darker deeper waters where it's generally notorious for sharks and dolphins to horde schools of fish into those areas. Unfortunately beaches like this are similarly notorious for king waves to wash fisherman into deep waters - hopefully not when sharks are feeding!)

Climbing back up the steps sure proved being a good workout - we had to resort to grunting and sign language to communicate amongst each other.

Nearby we saw part of the Bibbulmun track - I think this was part of the shelter...

The Bibbulmun track is a 1,000km walking track from Perth to Albany! Apart from being on bits and pieces of it (like here) I have never really ventured on it.

Our next stop was Whale World where you pay to see what was done back in the good ol' days when man hunted whales. I remember coming to this place even when I was a kid.

Next was Misery Beach. Strange name, huh? To me that's an oxymoron - how can any beach be a misery?? However, on this beach was part of Isthmus Hill which takes about 6-8 hours to walk. The old man thought we could take a short cut by climbing the steep slopes. He began recounting the last time he was here and how he lost several layers of skin from losing his footing.

Nice. What are we waiting for then?

There were only three ways of getting up this thing: 1) zig-zagging up, 2) going on all fours like a crab, or 3) flying up.

Unfortunately we hit a point where it was too steep and we were both too buggered... and to think that getting down was even harder!

Our next stop was one of the many solitary bays that had a beautiful beach. This particular beach had two surfers taking advantage of the nice waves rolling in.

Another stop, another bay. This one had no track going down to it (it would've been too steep). It was also very deep and probably another catchment for sharks and dolphins when hording salmon or other such fish.

And then there's the natural bridge...

Then the gap...

It's a shame there wasn't much swell, and to think that several people have lost their lives by falling in! Eeek! Your only hope would be to climb as high as you could and cling on for dear life, because you definitely wouldn't be able to swim out!

This next photo didn't turn out too well but on our way back into town we saw a whale with her calf. It was quite funny because the mother waded with her white belly up and the calf was trying to do the same thing. I couldn't believe how close they were to shore! And on the rock to the right was a seal watching it all.

On Sunday I went to Middleton Beach to find out where we'd be staying in December. The place looks quite new and is only a stone's throw away from the beach and the golf course! YES!!

Anyway, those were pretty much all the photos I took during the trip.

I'll detail more when I get time later today/tonight.

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

Melbourne Locked In

I've finally locked in my Melbourne trip.

I'm leaving here early Wednesday morning on the 15th November and arriving back Sunday night on the 18th.

Initially I planned on spending some time at my mate Chris' aunty's place, but thought against it.

Then I planned to spend a week hoping to get some shopping done, but then I'd just bought some clothes during the recent Father's Day specials (nothing like shopping for yourself when you're meant to be shopping for your dad!).

So apart from the U2 concert I really didn't know what else to do in Melbourne when I'm there. The only other thing would be to sit on a Temptation show and see the wonderful Livinia Nixon.

And being content with that I booked my flight and chopped my stay down to only a few days.

Watch out Melbourne here I come!

Ex Communication

Probably the most disturbing news I received during my brother's wedding on the weekend was a conversation I had with my grandma (who had celebrated her birthday on the same day as the wedding).

Initially she asked me whether I had talked to her son, my uncle, Shane.

When I told her I hadn't she eyed me and said, "He bumped into Cheryl the other day."


I braced myself.

"She was asking about you and how you were going and told Shane that Ella was coming back to Perth at the end of this year," she added.


"Stay strong, Ryan," she ended.

I'm glad she told me during the end of the wedding otherwise my mind would've been analysing everything about what was likely to happen.

For the uninformed Ella was the name of the woman I had my last serious relationship with - Cheryl is the name of her mother.

I don't know whether I've detailed the events of my relationship with Ella in here, but the Reader's Digest version of our relationship would go a little something like this...

> Boy meets sister's friend.
> Boy and girl fall in love.
> Boy and girl do the romantic thing for 4 years.
> Girl graduates uni as a teacher.
> Boy has friend who helps find job for girl.
> Girl gets job because of secret info from boy's friend.
> Boy and girl are now 300km apart.
> 4 months later girl says goodbye and falls in love with country man.

That was back in mid 2004.

Apparently since then girl has ditched country guy. And now, she's had enough of the country life and wants to come back home.

When I told a mate on Sunday about the news his first response was...
"She's going to get in contact with you."

I had a similar funny feeling like that too. I found it difficult to even sleep on Saturday night.

And ladies you might want to block your ears for what I'm about to say next, but there's one thing that really irks me about women.

You treat them nice, you be a gentleman, you have good times, you laugh together, you be a shoulder for her to cry on, you support them, you protect them, and then next minute that's all flushed down the toilet and means nothing when you've been "upgraded".

But, and I am referring to a real person here (a cousin of mine who was a very attractive girl and could've had any man), you have women that are abused in their relationship, get knocked up, enlarge their breasts to try and please their man who hardly ever notices them and they stay!?!

The axiom "Treat 'em mean to keep 'em keen" speaks volumes when looking at women in relationships like that - and the Jerry Springer show was full of em!

Thankfully some women out there have brains.


Yes, I'm a little ticked right now.

Ella was an attractive woman (I don't know if she still is - a lot can happen in 2 years) - she had long blonde hair, blue eyes, athletic figure, a beautiful smile with and a gorgeous laugh to boot.

But I can't ever get back with her.

I don't even feel anything for her now.

And when some says goodbye, how could their words of "I love you" ever really mean anything anymore? It obviously didn't mean much before.


I hope she never calls - and I have the beauty of having moved twice since the break-up so I've got some cover.

But having said that I also hope she doesn't turn into the other ex girlfriend I had that stalked me for 5-odd years!

Why do I get all the crazy ones?

Albany Already

It will be my mother's 50th birthday this Saturday.

And she's decided to celebrate it down in Albany.

"Are you interested in coming down to Albany to celebrate my 50th?" she asked over the phone on Sunday.

"Umm, what will be the plan?" I asked.

"We're going to fly down."

"Oh ok, how much will that be?"

"No no, you won't have to pay anything."

"Huh? It's your birthday, I hope you're not paying?"

"No, I've just stolen some shiny card out of your father's wallet that has all these funny numbers on it."

"Ah, well in that case let's go to Mauritius!"

"So are you in?"

"How could I knock back a free flight to Albany!"

So there you have it.

Another jam packed weekend.

It'll be good because I'll be able to stake out the area for where we're staying during the Christmas and New Year holiday... and hopefully catch up with some long lost cousins too.

If I Had A Dollar For Every Time...

If I had a dollar for every time someone at my brother's wedding mentioned one of the the following I'd be a rich man...

"So... Ryan, when are you getting married?"

Being in the eldest in a family of three I think everyone expected me to be the first in pretty much everything in life. Initially I'd palm the question off by saying something funny, but as the question kept coming my answers turned more and more serious.

On one answer I gave to someone I told them that there just weren't any women in the age group I seek - "Sure, it's great for the ego to be able to get 20-21 year olds," I told them, "but the last thing a woman wants to do at that age is settle down, in fact, at that age they're life's just getting started."

"What are you nuts?" was the reply.

I'd tend to think I'm a little more mature.

And if I were given a dollar for every time that question was asked I think I would've been able to BUY a bride!

"Where did you get your hair done?"

This was probably the funniest quote. I mean, which guy (even at a wedding) has ever had his hair professionally done??

Each answer I gave was, "Oh it's this place called 'My Bathroom' and they actually allow you to do your own hair!"

Some were a little inebriated to fully appreciate the humour.

"What do you think of [insert chic at wedding here]?"

The "chic" would range from the bridesmaid I was locked with during photos and waltzing, to the waitresses, to someone who knows a friend of a friend who happens to also have a friend who just so happens to have a daughter!


"Are you gay?"

This would pretty much immediately follow immediately after the previous question. Especially if the person who asked the question had pointed to anything in a skirt and asked what I thought about her.

I had to politely tell one inebriated person that that "chic" he pointed to with the large skirt on wasn't actually a chic... it was a table with a sheet over it.


Ah, fun fun.


Did I mention that people asked when am I getting married?

Monday, September 11, 2006

5 Year Recall

I remember 5 years ago when I was 23 years old when our family lived in Kardinya the twin tower attacks in New York.

I remember on that Tuesday night driving my mum's car to drop off a DVD our family had rented during the weekend and hearing on the ride back the DJ on the radio talking about what was happening in America.

Initially I thought it was just some sick prank and it wasn't until I arrived back home that I asked my father who was sitting in the lounge room looking at the TV screen,
"Is there something happening in America?"

My father just pointed at the screen with wide-opened eyes prodding me to look.

I don't think I got to sleep until around 3-4 o'clock in the morning that night.

I'll never forget.

Sunday, September 10, 2006

My Brother's Wedding

As some of you know my brother married yesterday.

Yep, I now have two sisters.

Things were a little frantic with final preparations, as most weddings usually have, but everything on the day ran quite smoothly.

They say a picture paints a thousand words and while many photos were taken by the photographer (who was really good BTW - I can highly recommend him, although I haven't seen his photos yet!?) so here are some of the photos I took...

This photo is a little deceptive, but it's the calm before the storm. The groom and his merry men all dressed at my folk's place (seen above) and as you can see things were quite normal. Before this though I had to pick my brother up from the Duxton Hotel at 8:30am where they were going to stay for the next couple of nights before embarking on their honeymoon down south at Margaret River.

There were a couple of minor episodes that showed the wedding was hindering his ability to think straight, such things as forgetting his wallet, and not knowing where to park (etc). I put this hear to remind myself that if I ever wed I want to make sure I get everything organised so that ON the day I have to only make one big decision and then let the day flow from there... I'll just be a skatterbrain with anything that happens before the event.

Anyway, the picture is deceiving because the outside part looks as though it was a beautiful sunny day - this wasn't necessarily so when we left my folk's place it had actually poured down with rain only minutes before!

I looked at my brother as we made our way to the car and said, "I hope you've got a back-up plan!" but thankfully the sky cleared ALL DAY during my brother's wedding (and the footy)... it was really quite amazing - even the weatherman was perplexed.

And here's the main man of the event... my little brother - contemplating what's about to happen in t-minus 52 minutes and counting.

And here is with his best man, Ben, who've been friends for 20 odd years. Ben married only a year ago so I think he was giving some advice about what to do such as breathing... which alwats helps I guess!

There's my folks. (I liked that lacey "jacket" my mum was wearing - well that was what she called it when asked what it was... and the rest of her dress was nice too - just don't ask me what colour it was!)

And here we are setting sail.

As mentioned before, I was surprised that it wasn't raining when we arrived at the Matilda Bay Restaurant (where both the reception and ceremony were held). Ben is giving some last minute breathing tips - I think, either that or telling him it isn't too late to run!

The scenery was quite picturesque with the Perth city in the background... I can see why the chose this as their venue (or was that because my brother proposed here?).

It was now only a matter of time before the bride arrived - and notice the sun is how beginning to come out (nice). As a joke, on the rehersal day last weekend I asked Carlie how long we would need to wait before we knew she wasn't coming - as Carlie is notorious for being late. Thankfully we didn't need to wait too long today!

The ceremony went quite casually - we all laughed when Danny, the celebrant, told Carlie to repeat after him and he then read out a whole paragraph! I guess you had to be there. After the ceremony the bridal party was whisked to the photo venue being a small hop, skip and a jump away at UWA (just over the road).

I didn't realise just how picturesque the university was! All I ever knew about UWA was where the basketball courts and rec hall were! I didn't realise there were gardens (etc)!

Ben, the best man, did a good job - his speech was nice. One of the side
-effects of our attire was that we wore a black jacket, with black pants, with a black vest... when that sun came out, even though it was only 24 degrees, we felt every beam. While the bridesmaids were lapping up the sun because of their thin dresses, we were cooling in the shade.

And speaking of the bridesmaids...

... their dresses were stunning (I like the colour - just don't know what it is??). And speaking of dresses...

... Carlie's dress was nice. Wasn't as nice as Dan and Melissa's wedding 2 weeks ago, but I like the strapless dresses.

Then at the end of the ceremony we all said our goodbye's and they lived happily ever after.

With all differences aside (between Carlie and I), it was difficult to be anything BUT happy for the couple. Weddings are a special event, and to be bitter and twisted about someone would be wrong, and not to mention heartless (and I'm not *that* low!).

I'm glad they're both happy, and only time will tell of their undying love and commitment to each other - which I hope will endure forever.

As for now... congratulations Adam and Carlie!

I wish you both the very best.

I really do.

(There is much more to tell about the event, but I'm extremely tired and I'll have to find some other time during the week to write about it.)

Monday, September 04, 2006

Goodbye Denise

On Saturday night we celebrated my sister's 24th birthday at the Pines restaurant at Observation City.

While the night went pretty much as most birthday celebrations do at restaurants, I noticed that next to our table was a chic that I sware looked exactly like Denise Richards.

It was freaky!

Too freaky really.

Why is this freaky? You ask.

Some of you may recall that my brother had a crush on Denise Richards during his hormonal years, in fact, I blogged about it in March this year and told you some of his fiancee's insecurities about the thing.

I just found it soooo interesting that exactly one week before his wedding - his last Saturday night as a single man - saw someone like Denise Richards sit pretty much right on his lap.

I don't know if he noticed her (I was too busy keeping an eye on her anyway... because I had to make real sure she looked like Denise! ;op ), and I wasn't going to say anything to him lest the wrath of his fiancee pour down upon me with fire and brimstone.

But... I was able to enjoy the night and have a personal chuckle over it.

My New Woman

I met the perfect woman today whilst celebrating Father's Day at the Fremantle Ars(e) Museum (sorry... ARTS Museum - I always think the T is silent in ARTS with some of the work I see... don't know why).

Anyway, we met at the back of the museum, and hit it off pretty much straight away.

She's very attractive, I'm sure she's slated to be the next Miss Universe.

Yep, I think we're in love...

The way she looks at me with those bulging eyes.

The way we hold hands... sorry, fingers... together.

The way she smiles at me with those false silver teeth (and you all know how easily I'm impressed with a smile).

Her white-out sniffing stained nostril.

And her beautiful straight nose (which oddly enough actually starts from the back of her neck - bit like an elephant really).

We're quite a couple.

My friends say she's a little flat and horny, but I think they're just jealous. ;op

Yep, she sure has captured my heart.

Anyway, take a look at my hottie...

And what comment could I ever make on my sister's new man?

How about: Stop picking on him??

The 9th Month

We've only just hit September and I'm already running around like a headless chook.

I know people do a lot of celebrating around Christmas and New Year's, but there seems to be one other thing that goes on which sees its cause 9 months later.

Pretty much everybody I know is having a friggin birthday this month! Or doing something else eventful.

Here's a list of this month's activity...
  • We all know my brother's wedding is this coming Saturday (9th of the 9th - easy to remember he says)

  • My sister's 24th birthday was yesterday (Saturday)

  • It was Father's Day today (Sunday)

  • It's my grandma's birthday on the same day as my brother's wedding

  • It's my mate Larry's 50th birthday on Friday, and

  • It's my mum's 50th birthday on the Saturday after the wedding!

Talk about a difficult month to save!

And I've got to find the perfect present for these people too! Eeeek!

I'm glad I'm going to be off in Melbourne in November... I'm going to need a holiday from all these celebrations and endless searches for the perfect present (I still don't know how you women find the energy to shop all day - I've usually given up after 15 minutes)!

And to think my birthday is coming around soon too...