Wednesday, February 08, 2006

Don't Shoot The Messenger!

It seems my last post about Aussie and American women created a furore - especially with American women being labelled as "proper".

Before I start allow me to preface myself by stating...

I'VE ONLY PHYSICALLY MET TWO AMERICAN WOMEN IN MY ENTIRE LIFE!

One (from Florida) I know quite well and she's very amicable (although maybe too amicable as she sure can talk!) and she married an Aussie bloke - so she's alright! The other (from Seattle) I only knew for a short space of time, but she was a little annoying.

And as much as it pains me to say this... she was a typical American tourist comparing pretty much everything to what America had (whether it was bigger, faster, longer... etc etc).

Which, during the whole time she was here, reminded me of that joke...

There was an American that arrived in Sydney who hopped into a cab and asked the cab driver to take him sight-seeing around Australia. On the cab driver's first stop the cabbie took him to the Sydney Harbour Bridge. After showing the American the splendour and size of the Syndey Harbour Bridge the American said,
"In America we have bridges that span over islands and go for miles and miles."

So, the cab driver, feeling inadequate moved on and drove inland to the Blue Mountain Range where he showed the American the Three Sisters. Again the American, unimpressed by all the fuss said,
"In America we have the Grand Canyon the largest canyon in the world."

Again the cab driver extended the trip and drove further inland - this time he stopped at Uluru (Eyres Rock). Unimpressed by what the American saw he said,
"In America we've engraved American president's into a rock."

Disappointed that the trip was a failure the cab driver drove back to Syndey. On the way back though a kangaroo jumped out of no where and hit the cab leaving a very large dent in the bonnet and windshield.

"What the hell was that?" asked the American as the kangaroo hopped away.

The cab driver unimpressed by the damage done to his car turned to the American and said,
"Bloody grasshoppers."

;o)

But getting back to the Seattle chic, yeah I was a little annoyed. Another thing that we had to do was speak slower so that she could understand what we were saying (if you've read this post the American chic referred to in there is the Seattle chic).

But I will give the Seattle chic credit... she did have a nice smile.

So from two women you've made a universal opinion on what American women are like?

Hey, I might be blonde, but I is not stupid.

;o)

I've just gathered intel from all other people who have similarly had experiences with the average American woman and I've noticed that most of them have reported a common theme about them, which is: they're proper.

Yep, I'm saying it again... proper.

I don't know why, but if it's not the case then I don't know why when American women travel overseas they put on a "proper" persona!?

But maybe this has a lot to do with why foreigners are so popular in America - they're something outside the properdom.

Properdom... that's a killer word!

I might have to trademark it... Properdom™

Okay, getting back onto my soapbox...

Yes, American women are attracted to something outside the properdom™ box, something that no other American woman can have because it's different - outside the properdom™ pig pen, so to speak.

Not only that, but American women are hard to please because everything they ever need is inside their properdom™ country - I mean just listen to Lenny Kravitz straining while singing the song "American Woman"! Think about it: all American women need do is from their properdom™ house use their properdom™ internet connection and voila - within minutes they can have whatever their properdom™ mouse clicked on to arrive in their properdom™ letterbox!

Properdom™ Properdom™ Properdom™

American women are just too proper.

;op

To prove a final point: I wonder how many really laughed at the word properdom™?

See!

I rest my case.

;op

3 comments:

mandy said...

Now that was a tad harsh! On behalf of all american women I must say we should not be simply classified as "proper." While America is a wonderful place to live the rest of the world has so many things to see, know, and love. If, as an American, you do not realize there are things better in other parts of the world then I think you must be ignorant and not "proper."

P.S. I laughed at the properdom.

Ryan said...

I'm going to see if I can make properdom the funniest word of 2006.

My mouth is so sore from laughing at it.

;o)

Jennifer said...

I don't know if I'd say we're all proper ... I guess I look at our regional differences/stereotypes, like people from the South are really friendly, and people from California are really laid back, and people from big east coast cities are cold and rude.

Who knows.