Monday, July 11, 2005

Canadian Chics

The first Canadian chic I ever met was one who stayed at my ex-girlfriend's place whilst travelling and working around Australia.

She was a great person to talk to and I had to admit I thought she was American.


They sound the same!

Shelley, the Canadian chic who was teaching around Australia, didn't take any offence when I initially inserted my foot into my mouth by asking whereabouts in the US she was from.

She had probably been asked that many times by ignorant Aussie blokes like me and curtly responded with,

"The best part."

Still not understanding I pressed,

"Which part's that?"

"The Canadian part of course!"

She laughed.

I was confused.

I swear she had an American accent, so not to be out done I pressed further,

"So you live in the US?"

"No, BC in Canada"

"You have American parents?"

"No, both Canadian"

"But you've got an American accent?"

"No, American's have a Canadian accent!"

She laughed again.

Well, I was beat.

I don't know how you tell the difference between an American and a Canadian, and they seem to think that you can't tell the difference between an Aussie and a Kiwi (a New Zealander).

It's easy!

Tell both people to say "Six". One will say "Six" the other will say "Sux". The person who "Sux" is a Kiwi!


Anyway, back to Canadian chics.

Last year I had the privilege of meeting two wonderful Canadian chics: Suzie and Becky. They were backpacking around Australia and had pretty much travelled the entire perimeter of our country.

The first time I met these lovely ladies I decided to be a little more general in my opening,

"Hi, where are you from?"

I hoped they weren't going to be too general in reply by answering something like, "My mom"... as I would've had no clue on what to ask next!

Thankfully they weren't.

"From Canada."


"Near BC"

Are all Canadian chics from BC? Or is BC the only habitable place in cold Canada?

As the night progressed we talked about Canada and some of its freezing cold temperatures. I can't believe people can actually reproduce in those minus 30 degree Celsius conditions... YOU'VE ALL GOT TO BE MAD... I don't think I'd even shower or go the toilet if I was travelling through Canada...


I mean, in Australia we are experiencing winter. I am rugged up to the hilt with layers of clothing and its only about 5 degrees Celsius... the lowest it ever gets around here is about 0 degrees.

I can't even *begin* to imagine what life would be like at minus 10, minus 20, minus 30 or heaven help me minus 40 degrees!

In fact Becky made mention that when she was travelling through Australia's top northern end (through Cairns-Townsville) there were days when it was around 40 degrees... nice and hot... and she contacted her family back home and they mentioned that it was MINUS 40 degrees on the farm!!!

A farm???

How can you have a farm in Canada? Are you farming ice? Are they farming icecreams?

It just doesn't make sense.

And boy can Canadian chics eat! Don't get me wrong here folks... I love a woman who eats... but at the rate these petite chics were going at it I thought they were storing up for winter when they were going to go back!

And lastly is it true what they say about Canadian chics?

I mean honestly now, you don't have to be shy the truth needs to be told once and for all...

Do Canadian chics have hairy legs?

Hey I'm just asking an innocent question. I mean it makes sense: cold climates, the basic human need to keep the body insulated - keeping all the hair intact makes sense!

And don't get me wrong as I'm a hairy bloke myself... and I'm not ashamed of it, I flash it around all the time during the summer and praise the Lord for it during the winter... maybe Canadian chics do the same thing!

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